Confidence

Updated: Jun 26, 2019





Why is it so hard to be confident?

Ever take a nice selfie and stop yourself from posting it? What was the internal dialogue that went along with that?


I bet it sounded something like this...

“Oh this one is cute, but I’m making a weird face.” or “This one is ok but my eye looks funny.”

Does that sound right?

Or maybe you think it looks great but wonder what your friends will say? Will they think you’re conceited or full of yourself?


I was tasked with a simple activity meant to boost my confidence and I found it so difficult to do. The task? Make a list of 10 things you like about yourself.


I started out and thought it would be easy but after the first one I froze. It wasn’t because I couldn’t think of any it was because I did not feel worthy of writing them.

While compiling my list I started to hear what others have said to me, about me or even about others in my presence and those words became my inner critic or “gremlins”.

I’m sharing some of the things I wrote down with the inner voice to show how our confidence is can be shifting by external influences. We believe what we allow ourselves to believe, what we allow our inner critics to say to us.


I wanted to say that I am SMART

but I heard you don’t know anything.

I wanted to say that I am STRONG

but I have been called fat so many times in my life that’s all I could think of.


I wanted to say I’m PRETTY

but I heard others saying I’m full of myself or conceited


I wanted to write down that I am a GOOD MOM.

but I have a million mommy blogs, friends and family members that tell me I’m doing it all wrong.


I wanted to say that I’m a runner but I told myself I’m so slow!

The truth is that my confidence was shifted because I heard what others have thrown at me for years. What society, magazines, friends and even family have said either about me or about others in front of me, has become my inner dialogue. So here’s my suggestions for creating a more confident self.


1. Surround yourself with people who lift you and others up! Don’t let negative people get into your mind! You are a combination of the top 5 people you hang out with. If your thoughts are bringing you down. Check your circle.


2. Detox your social media. Remove negative influences or accounts that make you feel bad about yourself. Fill your newsfeed with interests that bring you joy.


3. Learn how to accept a compliment and give them out freely to others! If someone pays you a compliment, say thank you and believe them.

4. Read an inspiring book or listen to an inspiring podcast! I recommend Girl Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis


5. Finally, make a list of things you like about yourself and don’t allow the rebuttal!


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